The Top 5

Note: I had this update almost done, then I went to lunch, came back, and my computer froze. I hope it's as entertaining as it was in its original form. The singers each did two songs this week, a Lieber/Stoller song and a song from this week's Top 40. Unfortunately, no one did "Hollaback Girl." What I wouldn't give to see any of our Top 5 singing, "This shit is bananas, b-a-n-a-n-a-s."

1. Anthony Federov: "Poison Ivy" (The Coasters): Feds has been growing on me the last few weeks, much like poison ivy. Also like poison ivy, this performance sucked. The trach was bejeweled again, and this just seemed kind of lame. I don't mind the song, but this was not the right song for Feds.

2. Scott Savol: "On Broadway" (George Benson): This wasn't bad. I'm not particularly a fan of this song, and there was some irony (not unlike rain on your wedding day) in Scott singing about not having enough to eat, but he did pretty well. I'm afraid of him though.

3. Vonzell Solomon: "Treat Me Nice" (Elvis Presley): I was surprised to see Randy get so excited, as I thought this was Vonzell's worst performance. Maybe it was because I didn't know the song, but I thought it was too much performance, not enough singing.

4. Bo Bice: "Stand By Me" (Ben E. King): Obviously, I love Bo, but this was especially good. The song was a good choice for him because it had a lot of actual singing rather than "Bo rocks out and whips around the mic stand." Given recent allegations, it would have been amusing to see Bo or Scott sing "Jailhouse Rock."

5. Carrie Underwood: "Trouble" (Elvis Presley): I thought Carrie was awesome and looked adorable, except for that creepy Ellie May Clampett sweater shrug thing she was sporting. She showed a lot of personality, and the part where she was singing "I'm evil" was hilarious.

6. Anthony Federov: "Incomplete" (Backstreet Boys): Feds, what a great song choice. Our resident singer with a hole in his neck sings about being incomplete, and the song includes the line, "Empty spaces fill me up with holes." It's like the trach jokes are writing themselves! Anyway, this song was perfect for Feds as it's the "Show Me the Meaning of Being Lonely" of 2005. It's just so epic! Feds did a great job, I was surprised the judges didn't like it more. I also would have enjoyed Feds singing "Boulevard of Broken Dreams (Bo also), am I on crack?

7. Scott Savol: "Everytime You Go Away" (Brian McKnight): I had a hard time deciphering what song this was, because I didn't think Brian McKnight would sing about "homies." Anyway, the song was boring, but again, Scott was good. I hope he's gone though.

8. Vonzell Solomon: "When You Tell Me That You Love Me" (American Idol finalists): CHEATER! Vonzell, you can't sing the song that you already sang! This was a perfect opportunity for Vonzell to sing some Destiny's Child (I suppose "Lose My Breath" would be more appropriate for Feds though), and she sings a song she's already trained to sing. All cheating aside, she sang the hell out of this song.

9. Bo Bice: "Heaven" (Los Lonely Boys): Bo, I love you. This song is so overplayed, but you rocked it. I kind of figured Feds would sing this one, as he seems to like anything Latin, but Bo, as usual, was awesome. I wish I had more to say, but I don't, except that I recall a few months back someone from Los Lonely Boys gettng caught for pot possession. I guess Bo could relate.

10. Carrie Underwood: "God Bless the Broken Road" (Rascal Flatts): I love this song, and this made me so happy. Carrie sang it beautifully, and she didn't oversing it at all. It was great. It amuses me how Paula told Anthony that it's difficult to sing a song by a group when he sang Backstreet Boys, but made no such comments to Bo or Carrie.

Do I even need to say who should stay or go? I think I've made it obvious by now. Tonight is a good night, we have American Idol AND the Primetime Live "Paula Abdul slept with Corey Clark" expose. Can't wait!