The Top 6

Sorry this is coming a little late, I've been doing projects all week. First, I have to say that I'm mourning Constantine. Something happened over the last few weeks, and I think it was his performance of "Bohemian Rhapsody," that made me really, really like him. It got to the point where I was able to actually look at him while he was performing (rather than hiding my face in a pillow), and (this is difficult to admit) I actually thought he looked kind of hot on Wednesday on the results show. Scott Savol, I cannot handle you any longer, though if this site has anything to do with it, I'm somewhat amused.

So the whole Bo thing. Honestly, I'm not too distraught. The pot thing I wasn't too surprised about, he looks high most of the time. Coke, however, is sketchy. When I think of coke, I think of '80's movies with men in suits (yes, my cocaine references are limited to what I've seen in movies and afterschool specials), not my "bud" Bo. However, I am slightly amused that Bo was caught scoring coke outside a strip club. How Whiskey Tango.

Ok, the performances:

1. Carrie Underwood: "When God Fearin' Women Get the Blues" (Martina McBride): Enough with the Martina, Carrie. I am not a fan of that woman. Anyway, I honestly thought that Carrie was bad tonight. Like Randy said, she sounded off. Up to this point, I've never thought Carrie's vocals were anything short of excellent, but this was bad. I honestly think she and Savol tied for worst of the night.

2. Bo Bice: "I Don't Wanna Be" (Gavin DeGraw): Um, I love this song. There's just something amusing about Bo singing the theme song to "One Tree Hill." Anyway, I really liked this a lot, though his outfit was HORRIBLE. Bo, Mom said to set the table with the tablecloth, not WEAR the tablecloth. I was also glad to finally get confirmation on the first line of this song: "I don't need to be anything other than a prison guard's son." That's what my brother and I thought he was singing, but we thought surely we were hearing wrong. Anyway, I kind of had cognitive dissonance hearing a song that new on this show, but it was awesome.

3. Vonzell Solomon: "I Turn to You" (Christina Aguilera): This was good, but not her best. I just think that Christina has such powerful voice that it's hard to sing her songs. Vonzell has a great voice, but it's not powerful in the style that Christina's is. However, this was pretty good.

4. Anthony Federov: "Surrender" (Celine Dion): Risky undertaking, Trach, and I can't even make any trach jokes about it! However, I think it would have been awesome if he sang "Show Me the Meaning of Being Lonely" or another BSB song, I think he could have rocked it. Then again, Feds could have shown his incomprehensible Latin flavor again and sung "Trach Your Bon Bon." Surprisingly, this was very good, I liked it a lot. I think Feds is pretty clueless, but he seems sweet. I don't want him to win, but I think he's got another week in him.

5. Constantine Maroulis: "How You Remind Me" (Nickelback): Ok, this performance showed how much Constantine has redeemed himself in my eyes. At the beginning of the season, I hated Mr. Maroulis and didn't even want him to make the Top 12. I especially hated all his poseur rock performances. But Wednesday night, Constantine did another poseur rock song, from the second worst poseur rock band EVER, Nickelback (the worst band is Creed), and I didn't hate it. Even though I am incredibly sick of that song, I didn't mind it. Not his best, but not awful. Yet I would have hated it a few weeks ago. Again, American Idol dishes out the cognitive dissonance. Note: Constantine's brother looks like David Byrne.

6. Scott Savol: "Dance With My Father" (Luther Vandross): I had a feeling he'd sing this, as Scott seems really set on making himself the white Luther (or Ruben). And it sucked, as usual. I've lost the ability to believe that he has talent. Maybe I'm wrong, but I'm just so bored by him.

The best: Bo
The worst: Carrie (and Scott)
Who should have gone: Scott

In my opinion, final three should be Bo, Carrie, and Vonzell. We can only hope.

The Top 7

This week's theme was "70's Dance Music." In some cases, I think the term was used loosely.

1. Constantine Maroulis: "Nights on Broadway" (Bee Gees): I couldn't stop laughing at this because all I could think of is when they do the Barry Gibb Talk Show on SNL with Jimmy Fallon and Justin Timberlake, and this is the theme song. Anyway, I think Constantine sounded pretty good, he was just drowned out by the background music. And Constantine? The eyeliner. You looked like The Crow.

2. Carrie Underwood: "MacArthur Park" (Donna Summer): Someone left Carrie' hair out in the rain, and then she got electrocuted. She was not looking good. This song was ridiculous. However, Carrie sang it well. As usual, she did not look very connected to the song, although I don't know how you connect to that song. Side note: my dad was eating sugar wafers, and we reminisced about my kindergarten "recipe" for sugar wafers mashed up into peppermint ice cream. I busted out with, "And I'll never have that recipe agaaaaaaaaaaaain!" and my dad did the "Oh NOOOOOOOO!" quite well. Good times.

3. Scott Savol: "Everlasting Love" (Carl Carlton): Boring. I just think this song is overplayed. He didn't suck, but he's not going to win.

4. Anthony Federov: "Don't Take Away the Music" (Tavares): Oh Feds. You make this to easy for me. Obviously I was singing, "Don't Trach Away the Music." This didn't suck, but he sounded kind of. . .yelly. That might not be a word, but I've made it a word. I probably would have liked Feds if he picked a song I knew, but this song was cheeseball.

5. Vonzell Solomon: "I'm Every Woman" (Chaka Khan): Vonzell's voice is not as strong as Carrie's, but she knows how to perform and connect with a song. This was very good. There's something about her that's very charismatic and makes you want to watch her.

6. Anwar Robinson: "September" (Earth, Wind & Fire): The opening footage? Too.Much.Crotch. Anwar's left eye is kind of creeping me out, it's a bit wonky. Anyway, I love this song. Does anyone else remember (besides my entire family, because we were so entertained) a couple seasons back when Verdine from Earth, Wind & Fire was a guest judge? His hair is magical. Anyway, I think Nikko could have done this song much better, at least he could have sung the chorus! Dude, if a song's chorus is too high for you, pick a different song.

7. Bo Bice "Vehicle" (Ides of March): Though I kept thinking about the car commercial, Bo did quite well. Again, I wish he'd pick more songs that have large amounts of straight singing, but still, very, very good. I love his voice. But again, Bo, put down the mic stand. Somebody's gonna lose an eye. Question: how is this a dance song?

Best: Bo, Vonzell, Carrie
Worst: Scott, Anwar

The Top 8

First things first: Nikko was robbed.

This year's theme was "Songs From The Year You Were Born." My brother commented that it would have been better to have "Songs From The Year You Were 10," since they'd be more likely to know the songs, but this was still really good.

1. Nadia Turner: "When I Dream" (Crystal Gayle): Nadia sang this well, but I knew she'd get slammed on song choice. So many songs, and she picks this dreck? I'm sorry, but I think there could be a lot better options from 1977. "Dancing Queen" came out that year! If Nadia's out this week, I think it's her own fault for picking such a dull song. When Randy's never heard it, that's pretty obscure. Also, the way she defended her choice by talking about how she's a dreamer did not work for me.

2. Bo Bice: "Freebird" (Lynyrd Sknyrd): Bo was more Bo-like tonight, he sang this very well, but I think it could have been more exciting. It was awesome, but I would have liked to see him rock out more.

3. Anwar Robinson: "I Know I'll Never Love This Way Again" (Dionne Warwick): Better than usual, but I think I just don't like Anwar's voice. He's very nasal and he sounds kind of forced. It was a good song choice for him, but I think he might want to dial down the smiling during such a dramatic song.

4. Anthony Fedorov: "Everytime You Go Away" (Paul Young): I wanted to hate this, but I couldn't. Fedorov did a very nice job. I still feel that he doesn't have enough subtlety though, and doesn't get into the emotion of the song. I may be making sense, or I may be sounding like Paula, you be the judge. Anyway, this was really, really good. Admittedly, I was singing, "you trach a piece of me with you." Trach jokes just never get old for me.

5. Vonzell Solomon: "Let's Hear It For the Boy" (Deniece Williams): Ok, I LOVE this song, so I was quite excited, and Vonzell did it well. Maybe not her best performance ever, but it was still quite good, and part of my liking it was because it was a good, recognizable song. You hear that, Nadia?

6. Scott Savol: "She's Gone" (Hall & Oates): Of course she's gone, Scott, you threw a phone at her! Yeah, this was pretty bad. He did well on the chorus, but the verses were terrible. He was very mumbly and did not sound right. Hall & Oates are looking quite scary, by the way. Oates looks like Chapter 11 John Leguizamo with a perm. Also, Scott doesn't get any props for talking about how brave he is to be onstage. The ego will not help you.

7. Carrie Underwood: "Love Is a Battlefield" (Pat Benatar): Another song that I love, and Carrie sounded really well, very Pat Benatar-esque though she went a little crazy with the vibrato. She looked cute (love the top) but I could see where Simon's "kitten being a tiger" comment made sense. Also, her dancing was HORRIBLE. At least do the shoulder shimmy!

8. Constantine Maroulis: "Bohemian Rhapsody" (Queen): God help me but this was brilliant. I still can't look at him and found myself screaming a couple times when he looked at the camera (and please, Constantine, put that tongue back wherever it came from), but WOW. I didn't know he could do that! He just sang it so, so well, and it worked for him. However, he would have gotten bonus points for me if he included "Scaramouche, scaramouche, can you do the fandango?" Maybe next time.

The best: Constantine, Anthony
The worst: Scott, Anwar

The Top 9

Ok, last night's theme was "Showtunes." This had promise for me. I don't love a lot of showtunes, but I know a lot of showtunes, especially from junior high solo contests. Note: if I have any experience with the songs these people are singing, I will add little "trivia notes." Anyway, here we go:

1. Scott Savol: "To Dream the Impossible Dream (Man of La Mancha): Scott, ever since your rap sheet came out, the impossible dream is you winning this thing. Now, don't throw a phone at me or anything, but this was not too good. It's a little too "epic" of a song for Scott, and I just wasn't feeling it. Trivia note: Shocker! Luther Vandross has a version of this song. How conveeeeeenient.

2. Constantine Maroulis: "My Funny Valentine" (Babes in Arms): First off, was this the "smooth jazz" version of this song? I've never been a fan of WNUA 95 point feye-ive. Anyway, Constantine continued on in the proud tradition of "you sound good, but I don't want to look at you." I'd suggest putting a bag over his head, but that might muffle the sound. Question: is the line "Is your figure less than Greek?" really in that song, or did Constantine just add it as props to his Hellenic heritage? He got all smirky at that part.

3. Carrie Underwood: "Hello Young Lovers" (The King and I): Simon said that her performance was old-fashioned. I would say that her hair was old-fashioned. Hello Jersey 1989! Anyway, Carrie sounded incredible as usual, but she is a bit. . .robotic. She sounds amazing, but I would like to see her emote, or laugh, or something. She is soooo good though. Trivia note: I sang "Getting to Know You" from this musical in my eighth grade solo contest. I got a second because I didn't sound happy enough. I wasn't happy enough because my friends got to the room for my performance right after they closed the doors and the judge wouldn't let them in, beeyotch.

4. Vonzell Solomon: "People" (Funny Girl): Ok, I don't like this song, it's sooo cheesy and overdone. Vonzell sounded very good, but not outstanding. I did enjoy her voice, but I just don't like this song and I felt like the performance was missing something. Anyway, I bet Mikalah is a bit T.O.'d that she didn't get a chance to sing her beloved Babs.

5. Anthony Federov: "Climb Ev'ry Mountain" (The Sound of Music): Oh no, this was wrong. Federov sucks at song choice. As my brother said, "You don't sing a song that a nun sings." Anyway, "Trach My Breath Away" (as someone on Television Without Pity referred to him)was bad, especially the assy last note. Federov, you can go now. Trivia note: I sang "Sixteen Going on Seventeen" from this musical for my seventh grade solo contest. I got a first, and also came up with a classic parody of this song (classic by seventh grade standards), "Sixteen Going on Twenty-One." The lyrics as I recall: "I am sixteen going on twenty-one, I have a fake ID. I drink some beer and I drink some whiskey, I puke all over the street. . ." "I got pulled over once or twice, the cops made me walk the line, I got arrested once or twice, I had to pay a hundred dollar fine!" The final line: "I am sick of drinking wine coolers, I-eye want so-ome real booze." I assure you that I didn't drink till just before college, so I don't know how I came up with this stuff.

6. Nikko Smith: "One Hand, One Heart" (West Side Story): I had hoped this would be awesome, as I love this song, and I think it would have been good if not for the crappy duet parts. Did we need the chick singer? I admired Nikko's efforts to update the song a bit, but the runs were a little out of control. Anyway, not his best, but I still like him. Trivia note: a certain swimmer (Shannon, obviously you know who I'm talking about) sang this song for solo contest one year.

7. Anwar Robinson: "If Ever I Would Leave You" (Camelot): This was boring. I'm not feeling Anwar anymore, and he's getting the creepy eyes thing going like Constantine. I just wasn't into it, and this was the only song performed that I didn't know.

8. Bo Bice: "Corner of the Sky" (Pippin): I do really like this song, but it just didn't work for me. I love you Bo, but you have had a couple rough weeks. Also, the outfit: you looked like you jumped into a giant Twizzler. It just wasn't his best performance. Trivia note: this was the JCA musical our sophomore year, I think, and Shannon, I can only picture Dustin Pirc singing this song.

9. Nadia Turner: "As Long As He Needs Me" (Oliver!): I like this song a lot, and Nadia did really well. I don't think she has the strongest voice, but she did a good job, though I didn't like the way she "diva'd" up the end. A little much for me. Nice job Nadia.

Best: Carrie, Constantine (ok now I need to take a shower), Nadia
Worst: Anthony, Scott